♡V
I just really really need you now.
♡V
GEE.
♡V
I don't know what I'm feeling, I'm torn between jealousy and happiness, but I miss this person a lot right now.
three little birds sat on my window and they told me I don't need to worry.
three little birds sat on my window and they told me I don't need to worry.
♡V
I'm really fat and I hate it
I feel like eating beef now
and Marche. the Rosti, ohmmmmmmmmmmm
then I feel like puking because I feel disgusted for thinking about food
I feel like eating beef now
and Marche. the Rosti, ohmmmmmmmmmmm
then I feel like puking because I feel disgusted for thinking about food
♡V
at this point, I'm pissed, but completely detached. is that possible?
♡V
I seriously want to cry right now omg what the fuck did I do why did I do that omg I just want to scream and cry and beat someone up and hurt myself why am I so fucking stupid ugh why
and please please please please text me soon because I really need to talk to you
and please please please please text me soon because I really need to talk to you
♡V
what is going on what is going on
♡V
okay you can go away now
♡V
One day I'll stop loving you.
♡V
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♡V
And the worst thing is I can't even tell anyone what you said because they'll probably agree with you anyway, silently or not.
Chances are the world is right if everyone agrees on something about you that you don't agree with.
You're good-for-nothing you're fat you're ugly you're stupid you're useless
But I always think that maybe they're wrong.
The looks they gave me. THE LOOKS.
I'm apparently being judged for not trying out for something that I wasn't interested in in the first place.
So what if the course was perfect, I'm not.
I don't even know what I deserve or don't deserve anymore.
Chances are the world is right if everyone agrees on something about you that you don't agree with.
You're good-for-nothing you're fat you're ugly you're stupid you're useless
But I always think that maybe they're wrong.
The looks they gave me. THE LOOKS.
I'm apparently being judged for not trying out for something that I wasn't interested in in the first place.
So what if the course was perfect, I'm not.
I don't even know what I deserve or don't deserve anymore.
♡V
hahahah what did I just do I'm so retarded
Okay working on ToK now l0lz my priorities
Okay working on ToK now l0lz my priorities
♡V
One reason why I think college isn't worth the time and money is because I've had enough of being the person that's left out all the time.
Sure people do listen to me when I'm with them, then after we say goodbye it really is goodbye.
I don't want to be the loser in college who has no one to hang out with, I don't want to be the shortest girl who is always taken for granted simply because of my size. And perhaps race, depending on where I go.
I don't want to be stereotyped, and any attempt to break the stereotype just makes me stereotyped into the kind of people who is enforcing my identity on others.
Paying thousands of dollars to feel insignificant all over again and then spending the decade after working to pay off the loans is really not worth it.
Paying thousands of dollars to feel insignificant all over again and then spending the decade after working to pay off the loans is really not worth it.
I'd like to think that I deserve more than I currently have. Sometimes I believe that I'm being shortchanged. But I know I'm the kind of person who believes that you deserve what you get. So maybe my situation is really what I deserve.
Maybe I really am a boring, average, normal nobody who keeps insisting that there's something else inside of me that the world is too blind to see.
Who am I kidding but myself right.
♡V