When twitter's too short and Facebook's too public

Friday, June 26, 2015

I am an absolute knob.
I can't be open with you because you shook your head at me and you told me not to cry in front of you.
Now what the fuck can I do?
I'm feeling like shit, I feel it's partially

okay I feel slightly better now I'm glad you let me talk it out

♡V

I think Adam's mad at me.

And I'm scared.

I don't know what he's like when he's angry and I don't wanna find out.

Also I really like him and I don't wanna make someone I like feel that way.

"yeah great thanks."

Enough to ruin my night because of the doubt it seeded.

He hasn't replied. It doesn't help. How am I gonna sleep well now?

I've given him too much power over me. Or maybe I need to stop overthinking.

Everything is fine

He's not everything I've got.

But I would really like for us to see each other that way one day.

Not in the desperate codependent unhealthy sense of course.

♡V

I dreamt you wanted me back.

That really hurt.

I don't know how I could bring myself to say yes to you ever again.

I love you so much but we've been drastically altered.

Thank God I'm polyamorous, or else I'd never move on.

I need to remember why we broke up.

You're manipulative.

You made me feel horrible about myself.

You didn't commit fully to me.

You used me as a rebound.

I've gotten into so much trouble because of you.

You hurt me and expected me to heal on my own.

You leave whenever you please.

You don't love me.

♡V

Monday, June 22, 2015

"Don't cry in front of me."

"It's my head I can do whatever I want with it"

"You wanna stir some drama well I'm not some 16-year-old I don't do none of that shit"

"Ya we're just friends this is just fun"

Some days they make me wish I'd died in my sleep.

It's so silly.

America just might be a new start.

I don't really wanna cut loose because you've been really respectful and a sweetheart and you're cute and you're funny and we get along and we like being in bed together. I really enjoy your company.

Why would you suddenly say those things to me then? You make me feel like a child. Don't dismiss me.

I'm missing something here. I feel like you feel the same way but the evidence shows otherwise.

This is kinda one-sided and I'd like to think I deserve better.

I wish you all the best.

Sleep well, and I hope you'll tell me when you think of me.

Take care of your shoulder.

♡V

Thursday, June 04, 2015

52. Are you nice to everyone? yes
53. Have you ever liked someone you didn’t expect to? yes
54. Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months and not cheat? definitely
55. Are you good at hiding your feelings? yes but I'm entitled to feel
56. Do you think you like someone? totally
57. Have you kissed someone whose name starts with a ‘J’? no...
58. Do you prefer to be friends with girls or boys? boys xxxx
59. Has anyone of your friends ever seen you cry? so many
60. Do you hate anyone? I don't get that concept
61. How’s your heart? probably clotted with trans fat
62. Is there something that happened in your past that you hate talking about? oh yes but I'd share anyway
63. Have you ever cried over a guy? lol
64. Who is probably talking a load of crap about you right now? fuck knows
65. Are your toenails painted pink? no
66. Will your next kiss be a mistake? lol no
67. Girls love it when boyfriends cry; correct? that's... not very nice...
68. Have your pants ever fallen down in public? probably
69. Who was the last person you were on the phone with? MOM :)
70. How do you look right now? like ass
71. Do you have someone you can be your complete self around? yeah of course
72. Can you commit to one person? oh sure
73. Do you have someone of the opposite sex you can tell everything to? once, unless if you count Ray because she's transitioning xx
74. Have you ever felt replaced? don't even start
75. Did you wake up cranky? nope
76. Are you a jealous person? jealousy's universal no?
77. Are relationships ever worth it? hah who the fuck knows besides my parents
78. Anyone you’re giving up on? probably on my third case now
79. Currently wanting to see anyone? all the time
80. Name something you have to do tomorrow? watch a show at the Tron!!!
81. Last person you cried in front of? oh christ... Ethan.
82. Is there someone you will never forget? yeah of course
83. Do you think the person you have feelings for is protective of you? meh no I'm a warrior
84. If the person you wish to be with were with you, what would you be doing right now? talk a lot? I don't know, you just want them around, you know?
85. Are you over your past? LOL doubt I ever will be
86. Have you ever liked one of your best friends of the opposite sex? I liked him and he became my best friend, he's gone now though so meh
87. Is there anyone you can tell EVERYTHING to? how many fucking times do you wanna ask this goddamn question
88. If your first true love knocked on your door with apology and presents, would you accept? yeah who doesn't like presents...?
89. So, the last person you kissed just happens to arrive at your door at 3AM; do you let them in? hah definitely and we kiss some more
90. Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
91. Will you be in a relationship in 2 months? fuck that
92. Is there anyone you know with the name Michael? yup x
93. Have you ever kissed a Matthew? nah
94. Were you in a relationship in January? probably. How was it going? hahaha to hades
95. Were you happy with the person you liked in March? yeah
96. Don’t tell me lies, is the last person you texted attractive? I think he's cute as fuck but his soul is black
97. Who do you have texts from? my mobile carrier...
98. If the person you like says they like someone else, what would you say? depends
99. Have you ever kissed someone older than you? HAHA
100. Who’s in your profile picture with you? just me
101. Ever kissed under fireworks? cliche
102. Has anybody ever given you butterflies? I should be over all the butterflies but I'm into you

♡V