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| JUST. LIKE. ME. |
I can't bring myself to do mRI. All I do is stare at my research and immediately I feel my chest tightening and my temples hurting and something like tears welling up in my eyes. What's the point of even doing it when I know I'm not even going to do well.
It's like a cancer patient carrying on with chemotherapy even in the fourth stage of her illness. What's the point. What's the point when she's gonna die in 2 weeks, and the chemotherapy is going to put her through so much more pain and when the anesthesia doesn't even work anymore. What's the goddamn point.
It's not like I haven't been trying my hardest, I daresay nobody else in the whole class churned up 50 pages of personally typed out research and stay up until 3 doing it while the rest of the world sleeps. Or goes for an MGMT or Maroon 5 concert. Whatever the fugh.
Honestly, what's the goddamn point.
Why am I even saying this when I'm still going to do it anyway. I suffer from student's guilt, and my stupid personality refuses to give up even when it's a lost cause. I'm a captain who insists on sinking with her ship.
I think the next 3 days are going to be one of the most painful days of my IB life.
The worst thing is nobody can get me out of this one.
♡V